Distractions for Good

It’s been a month since I’ve sat down to type: some journaling here and there, but no time dedicated to solidifying and refining my words. 

I allowed myself a guilt-free break from writing after my surgery. To be fair, it was difficult, albeit painful, to sit at the desk with my knee unable to bend, so I told myself this was the reason I wasn’t writing. But more honestly, it was because it felt too painful to sit with myself and give my feelings attention. 

Being limited physically, not just from this most recent flare but from all the times prior, has taken its toll on my mental health, and accepting that my health is outside of my control is not always easy. 

So, over the last few weeks, instead of facing my pains, mental and physical, I settled for distractions.

My mom used to tell me to watch TV if I was feeling too anxious to sleep; honestly, it worked. As a child, I didn’t see distraction as a negative thing but perhaps a means to an end—a way to pass the time and get by with what was before me. 

Then, as I got older and engaged in therapy, which taught me to look more closely at my habits, practice meditation, and work with a life coach, I began to think poorly of distractions. I saw only their drawback: they distract you from dealing with your life and its inevitable problems, emotions, or situations. 

I thought any distraction from being present with oneself would be harmful since the present moment is all we truly have. I understood that emotions are like our compass, helping us navigate life‘s journey and guiding us closer to our souls. Hence, processing emotions, even the difficult ones, was essential to better understanding ourselves, and there could be no room for distractions on my path to self-betterment. 

But a few years ago, I found myself in an anxious spiral as I struggled to differentiate thought from emotion since one can become the other. 

I had to step back, recognizing that not every thought is 

1. Real 

2. Fact or 

3. Deserves attention.

And when a thought arises, it’s OK to let it pass by. 

If we go to fill our glass in a stream, we cannot take all of the water, but just a little amount at a time is all we can handle and, in fact, all we truly need.

We must be selective of what we decide to hold onto, what gets to enter our minds, and our field of focus. 

But what if we face roaring rapids during the new spring melt, the river waters too swift to cross, let alone take a sip from? Would it be worth waiting to face it when we feel more capable and the waters have slowed?

Is there then a role for distractions? 

Especially when a tincture of time might be the best medicine for a challenging situation or life change. 

Perhaps sometimes our busy monkey minds do have our best interest at heart, encouraging us to seek distraction before we can face our emotions because some emotions can be far too much to bear all at once. While distractions may prolong our journey to healing if used in excess or without moments for introspection, I believe they can serve as helpful tools. 

Addressing big emotions or changes a small trickle at a time might be better, little moments of processing between moments of distraction. Nice visits with friends that lighten our mood, funny movies or card games to brighten our spirits, or good books that bring us joy to carry us into the next painful day while we wait for the slow and inevitable forces of change to bring sweet relief. Relief will come, perhaps slowly but surely it will. How we decide to weather that storm is entirely up to us, but I have learned that no way is wrong.